Redrawing Boundaries Without Sacrificing Distinctions - Jay Marshall*
For a religion that spends a lot of time speaking about love, Christianity enjoys a good fight. I marvel at that tendency. Though a member of a tiny group known as “Quakers” or “Friends” whose heritage touts peace as a virtue, if not an integral part of life, my own spiritual kinfolk can duke it out with the best of them. We do that despite the deep conviction that “there is that of God in all persons.” I recognize that love and peace are complicated topics for discussion and confounding practices to implement. However, that doesn’t lessen my dismay at the tension that seems inherent in many religious traditions.
One can name any number of lightning rods that has represented the “cause of the day.” Within my own tradition, it didn’t start with the Crusades, and it won’t end with the question of ordination of gays and lesbians. Outside my tradition where I am more an observer than a participant, I see similarities. The arguments are saturated with polished rhetoric, religious imagery, and soaked with appeals to holiness and purity. Calls are made to accept some designated set of Truths.
The cause beneath the symptoms seems to be a compulsion with marking the boundary that determines who is an insider and who is not. What accounts for the delineation of those marked as insiders? Though often discussed in terms like truth and obedience, the underlying question is “whom does God love more, and therefore knows the mind and will of God? Based upon that, who deserves to have authority and control?” These are high stakes! I have spent a good portion of my life watching, even participating, in these types of conversations. The sentiment, “There simply are no good wars.” echoes strongly in my mind.
Meanwhile within the larger context in which these disagreements persist, cultural wars bring both progress and confusion. Greater respect for marginalized populations and sensitivity to our own egregious complicity in systems that perpetuate these injustices are important and precious advances made in our global struggle to live more respectful, equitable lives. The mantras of “tolerance” and “inclusivity” are working their way downward into society’s collective consciousness. Interestingly enough, certain studies (e.g. Robert Putnam’s Bowling Alone) indicate that in the face of pressure to accept differences, the bulk of the U.S. population is merely retreating from public life. This amounts to a shrinking of the boundaries of engagement in which an individual chooses to expend energy and build relationships.
We are faced with a problem for our future that is not easily resolved, as “inclusivity” and “particularity” come into contact and conflict. When not critiqued, movements for tolerance and inclusivity leave unaddressed questions about the place, or even the propriety, of particularity. For those who attempt to remain engaged and involved, important topics are never addressed, or if they are, bland and generic answers assume the role of truth. As a consequence, persons can feel as though their own lives lack integrity. Perhaps this accounts for the withdrawal noted by Putnam, and even the elevated importance of drawing boundaries that define and distinguish, which frequently uses religion as its venue. The tensions between the multiple layers of our identities are complex.
ESR has not escaped being predominantly middle class and white, for that is the prevailing demographic of Friends in the U.S. We have, however, labored to be open and welcoming of those who are not part of this demographic. Neither have we avoided being well educated, which contributes to class separation; and really how could we, since education is central to our mission? However, we do seek to avoid elitist tendencies fueled by the privilege of education. We have not forsaken our identity as a Christian school in the Quaker tradition. However, we have chosen a commitment to inclusivity without the sacrifice of particularity. To do so, we work to clarify our own identity and belief systems, examining them and critiquing them, recognizing that the more we understand why we think as we do, the less threatened we are by those who disagree with us. We intend to claim these conclusions as our own while not requiring that others accept them exactly as we do, or at all. Meanwhile, we expand the circle of conversation partners, whether through literature, film, or guests to campus, and commit to making space for engaging conversation and thoughtful reflection. It is proving to be a powerful way to draw the circle wider, discovering that much exclusion made by previous generations no longer seem valid. At the same time on some level we all know that “not anything goes.”
ESR is hardly a monolithic group. Some days it seems we fit nowhere and please no one. Personally, I am tired of the religious wars that primarily use coercion to impose belief systems upon unwilling victims, or to ostracize those who are different. At the same time, I recognize a weariness in being bombarded with cultural messages of tolerance and inclusivity, the effect of which can mute the freedom to live with spiritual conviction.
These days, I find myself pushing a different question into these verbal battles: Must religion be exclusivist? If so, how tightly drawn are the boundaries? As dean of Earlham School of Religion, I witness the delight of enlarging the boundaries, the dilemma of not being able to escape the unpleasant dimensions of our ingrained tendencies, and ultimately the realization that there are some boundaries and preferences on the horizon that participants do not want to erase or discard. At that point, respect in spite of differences is preferred over the dilution or dissolution of our distinctions. This is terribly difficult work, and is much too important to ignore.
*Jay Marshall is dean of Earlham School of Religion.

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Comments
I've always liked Freedom Friends Church's (Salem, OR) definition of "Inclusive" in its Faith and Practice:
"To be inclusive does not mean that you try and make your table a place where everyone wants to sit - But it does mean that you try and make a place at your table for everyone who wants to sit there. (See exclusion.)"
Every gathering of people, not just religion, is inherently exclusivist, because people gather around common concerns and values. If someone joined my Kiwanis club, but then started talking about how we are spending too much time and money on helping children, that person would discover they didn't fit in. That's OK.
Here is a major simplification to make a point: identity = boundary. No boundaries and we lose our identity.
Discrimination becomes a legal issue when the criteria for inclusion are irrelevant to the mission of an organization. It's okay for a football team to specify that prospective members need to be capable of doing something effective towards winning football games, or that they need to move to whatever city or enroll in whatever institution the team represents. It wouldn't be okay to discriminate on a religious or ethnic basis.
I don't think your Kiwanis club would object if everyone in the world wanted to join to help children. It isn't that a collection of people needs a 'boundary'; what it really needs, to hold together, is a common intention. (& this, I would say, is where the contemporary Quaker 'boneless-chicken-farm' style of inclusivity has upheld Quaker principle at the cost of dropping our primary purpose of serving as a religious organization. Friends don't need a boundary between ourselves and people who have found God via other traditions, but many of our 'Liberal' branches are hampered by complete inability to agree on public statements as to what spiritual resources, if any, we have to offer the rest of the world.)
Dear Dean Marshall:
Thank you so much for your heartfelt expression of concern about our divisions. I share your concern, and I am glad that this is a topic of conversation at Earlham.
This is what I always come back to: "There is one, even Christ Jesus, who can speak to thy condition..."
Why are we spending so much time talking and so little time worshipping together over our differences? The Buddhists and the ego psychologists have much to say to our condition, that it is our egoes that are separating us artificially. But knowing that does little to heal us.
I am a believer, and I believe most Quakers are, in the idea that there is one God that unites us all, and that God can speak to our condition. I believe that God can do what we cannot. Whether you hear this literally or metaphorically does not matter. Please worship with me, that we may hear the way through this.
Linda Wilk
Thank you, Jay, for expressing questions and concerns that are also at the center of my heart. I love all the thoughtful responses and agree that the age-old question of how we maintain our individuality (boundaries) without creating more separation is very much alive here. It's a worthy question--maybe even one of the most important we struggle with, because it applies to everything: our relationship to others; our relationship to family; our relationship to our meetings; our relationship ultimately and inherently to God. How can we be both "selves" and "Divine expression" at the same time? When am I being "me" and when are my actions prompted by God? This is a question both for individuals and groups. Is there a division or does it all flow together seamlessly (this is my hope). I think these are challenging question even when we agree on the basics of faith, but when our experiences, loves, and leadings draw us to much different understandings than the person next to us, how do we understand "that of God" in all of us together? I can't reconcile it intellectually, but my heart whispers "mystery" and I try to stay open to feel and see God at work in the situation, whatever it might be.
And yet the gift of our very embodiment gives us voices and minds and the amazing ability to look out and make sense of our daily existence while we love the God we love. I personally find the range of expression beautiful and awe-inspiring; so many people loving God so many different ways!
I don't know specifically how to create a community that does "self" and "other" in a perfect way, but I think I have a sense of where it begins. Many years ago I read "The Cloud of Unknowing" and have always remembered the idea that we can't *think* our way to a closer relationship with God, but we can climb up in God's lap and experience it. Our love grows through genuine contact, and perhaps as our love for God grows, "that of God" in others will shine through more and more brightly, until the differences we at first saw on the surface no longer hold our attention because the inner light is so wonderfully compelling.
Thanks for a great discussion! And especially your beautiful response, Linda.
Peace,
Katherine